Usually, on Black Friday, our family gathers in the living room to decorate the tree with the wild assortment of ornaments our family has collected over the years. We spend the day talking about when we got them, what happened that year, and usually the "oh wow" of getting where we are from where we were.
Well, for the first time in a very very long time, I was working outside my home on Black Friday. My daughter is off at college, and it seemed so wrong to do it on Thanksgiving. Since then, it hasn't seemed right to do it either. I come up with one excuse or another and it just doesn't get done.
Today, I wasn't working, and had the house pretty much to myself. I made big plans to get the lights and decorations on the tree, get the decor out, etc. Never happened. As I stood there in the living room staring at the bare tree and coming up with new reasons why I can't get it decorated, I had one of my Epiphanies.
We moved into this lovely home in August. It is everything I have ever wanted in a home, and I plan on being here through the rest of my life. It's half the size of our last home, and I'm truly grateful not to have to care for all that extra space and its contents. Since I've been working, I haven't had time to do all the wonderful things I had planned to really make this house our home. No pictures on the walls, no curtains in the windows - blinds, but no curtains - no new paint, and the list goes on. Life throws you some curve balls, and sometimes you just have to step back from the plate.
So as I contemplated my sad little tree, I started thinking about all the other things that aren't in the house. Most of that really important stuff is still in boxes in the garage. Hmmmm.....
Hold on!
I've lived here for 5 months, been happier than I've ever been, have the home of my dreams, great schools for my terrific kids, an amazing husband, a brilliant daughter in college, a wonderful job with great coworkers, a warm and friendly community, and a garage full of really important stuff.
The last few years, we have asked our loved ones not to get our family any Christmas gifts. If they feel the must get us something, we ask them to make a donation to a charity instead. For the most part, our friends and family respect our wishes, but there are always a few that feel the need to get that one little thing - usually for our kids - for whatever reason. We don't send holiday cards because frankly we don't have the time, we keep in touch with most folks regularly and we're not the photogenic type. I mean in all reality, we spend $20 on a new widget for Auntie Sandra in the hopes that she likes it, and Auntie Sandra spends $20 on us buying a widget she hopes we will like, so what's the point? To keep from having a guilty conscious about giving enough?
So, back to the really important stuff in the garage. I have boxes filled with toys, clothes, furniture, papers - gotta keep those for the IRS though, electronics, appliances, decor, stuff that hasn't been out of boxes in years, heirlooms, memorabilia, mementos, you name it. Our family has not shed a single tear over whats out there, simply because...its not that important! My boys have entertained themselves with a few toys and a game console. I've really not had time to mess with all my hobbies. Instead I've been getting outside and working in the dirt. My husband has plenty of stuff to keep him entertained, and I'm still cleaning up stuff inside the house and taking it out to the garage. Why? Because I can't throw it away, that's really important stuff!
Hubby asked me the other day what I wanted for Christmas. It took me two days to come up with a list of about 3 things. I just don't need anything, and everything i want, i already have! The beautiful part is that none of it, not a singe solitary thing, is in that garage with all my very important stuff.
So, once again, I will tell my family and loved ones not to go out and buy anything for any of us. I'm sure that there will still be those who just have to get that one really important gift. Once again I will ask people to donate to those that don't have all the really really important stuff, like a long life to look forward to, health, food, a home, a job, hope, dreams, abilities, clothes, mental health, loved ones, or those who can't be with their families. Once again, We will donate what we can in time and treasure, and not spend hours at the mall to load up all our loved ones with more really important stuff. We will do our usual charitable contributions and spend some time giving back to our community. Someone will inevitably get their feelings hurt that we didn't get them anything.
So, this year my Christmas list boils down to one thing.
Dear Santa,
Please let everyone know that we are so amazingly grateful for what we have. Please say a prayer that they can feel as grateful and blessed as we do.
Sincerely,
Peg
Next week when my daughter comes home from college, the boys are out of school and I've got a day off, the tree will be decked out in its usual eclectic array of colorful pieces of gratitude and it will feel right.
After all, isn't that the really important stuff? Blessings!
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